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Walk This Way

From the Album Field of Dreams

If you’re lonely and feeling down
While the rest of the world is out on the town
There’s something that you can do
Guaranteed to chase away those blues
You don’t need money you don’t need fame
You don’t need to play their game
Ain’t nothing to it just do as I say
Get yourself ready, to walk this way

Walk this way, don’t hold back
The sillier the better, that’s a fact
Lift your leg in time to the sounds
When it feels right, put it back down
Swing your arms like a crazy bird
It ain’t no good if it ain’t absurd
Skip to the front, skip to the side
I’ve walked this way you can say with pride

It just don’t matter how bad you feel
It’s better than drink, better than pills
If you’re feeling down I don’t care what you say
You can’t feel bad, if you walk this way
You don’t know how to sing, don’t know how to dance
Well that don’t matter, if you give this a chance
Tell the world, come what may
That you’re ready to walk this way


The first line of this chorus had to be “Walk This Way” so Monty Python immediately sprang to mind. Despite being nearly fifty years since the Ministry of Silly Walks sketch was first broadcast, it is still going strong, and some countries even hold silly walk festivals every year. It occurred to me how great it would be to hold a Worldwide Silly Walk and Dance Competition, inviting the public to make videos of their silly walks and offer cash prizes to the fifteen winners.

I created a Kickstarter campaign to raise $3000 dollars for prize money. It was a spectacular plan that could have united the world in music and laughter, but the campaign was a spectacular failure.

I paid $160 to a company that assured me they could raise between $15,000 and $50,000 in pledges for the project. I managed to raise the grand total of $1. The company was so impressed with the idea and so surprised at the lack of interest that they took the project over. They got their experts to design a new campaign and were so sure of themselves that not only did they do the relaunch for free, but they told me if they didn’t raise the money, they would give me back my original $160. They created a very impressive campaign, but again it only raised $1.

Even with my track record, that was a pretty grim result, but in the words of the Monty Python team, “Always look on the bright side of life.”